FOR IMMEDIATE RELEASE

The Madison Mallards have retired the Zipline Entrance for Maynard.

Madison, WI – It is with great sadness the Madison Mallards have announced they are retiring the zipline their mascot Maynard G. Mallard would use to fly into the stadium. Renowned for his daring and exhilarating descent from the skies, Maynard has captured the hearts of fans for years with this thrilling spectacle. This sudden and surprising move by the team comes just weeks before opening day.

“After much contemplation and consideration of fan feedback, we have decided to retire the zip-line entrance,” General Manager Sam Rubin shared in a statement. “Frankly, it’s boring.”

Fans have taken to social media to express their mixed reactions to the news, with many expressing nostalgia for the zip-line entrance while others eagerly anticipate what Maynard has in store for them.

A spokesperson commented, “Maynard G. Mallard has always been an integral part of the fan experience, and we fully support his decision get rid of the routine.”

As anticipation builds for the upcoming stadium event, fans are encouraged to stay tuned for further updates from Maynard himself regarding his new entrance method.

If you have read this far, just know you got April fooled.